Crowtip’s Corner: A Mixed Bag of Responses as the Monsters Find Fame

The launch of Cornelius Clifford’s ‘Whodunnit?’ Easter Egg competition has spiked a great deal of interest in the monsters, resulting in the revolting squad of odd being all at sea concerning their newfound fame; their individual responses proving something of a mixed bag:

Lord Marmaduke and Gobby are rather excited at the prospect of the exposure doing wonders for their Monstrous TV viewing figures, whilst Jamie Orrible is even fantasising about getting his own cookery show. Moriarty and Albert are taking the experience as one might expect: like fish to water.

One of the beasts less-pleased at this sudden thrust into the spotlight is The Great Eye of the Wild Wood, who complains “it hurts”. Five Eyes – a creature as blind as can be – does not concur, however, instead commenting on how the whole situation actually sounds okay. Tronk – equally blind (though at least with the excuse of not having eyes) – says that everything seems to smell okay too.

Baby Rupert is so excited he can’t stop hiccupping; which would be cute if he didn’t hiccup fire. Indeed, the Mysterious Engineer has been so preoccupied with repairs that he’s been too busy to voice an opinion, hence his view remaining… well… mysterious. Another enigma can be found in Madame Claudette, her being as royally proper in her non-commital as ever.

The Reverend Obediah Biggot has been positively vitriolic in his condemnation of recent events, bewildered as to why anyone would want to entertain children. Surely that would make them heard? Although, if you ask Sister Tabitha – herself delighted about happenings – the Reverend is merely jealous that all the other monsters now have a platform to speak from.

Auntie Gertrude despairs of potentially having to spell out the word ‘wyrm’ all the time, with her already beyond tired of explaining how she “doesn’t look like a worm, because she’s not a worm, she’s a dragon.”

Mr Wiffle is spectacularly indifferent about the whole endeavour. At least, that seems to be the case. It’s difficult to discern how anyone really feels when they suffer with a voice such as his. Daffyd Longnose just hopes he won’t start getting recognised in the street, already saying he will refuse selfies; yet has begun perfecting a succinctly scribbled autograph instead.

Me? I say bring it on.


To pixie up your copy of Cornelius Clifford’s The Faerie Changeling, click this

To pixie up your copy of Cornelius Clifford’s Snoofs in the Witch’s Kitchen, click this

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